soul search.

yes. ive been wasting these few days not doing anything.
here i am, subconsciously, despite having a weary body, im not sleepy. hmm perhaps my subconsicious is stubbornly refusing to end my day jus liike that.
i was racking my brain for something to help mi kill time and then an idea struck me, yea i noe its no longer original but i went back to read my old CLASS BLOG.

for starters, the blog was meant for the class to share information and probably act as a space for every member in the class to probably also express how they feel abt any issues happening ard them. and yes, i created the blog for my class in jc... abt 5 yrs back? YEA...OMG ITS BEEN 5 YEARS.?!
oh wellls. i read thru the blog entries written by me and my classmates. ahhh brings back memoriess. once again, it kinda feels like ive transcended time and remembered all those minute details which would haf been forgotten. bahh as i read thru the posts, other than remembering the events which happened, i discovered smth interesting. smth which i hadnt noticed. i think i've really changed.

i remb why, i had more frens then than now. why, i felt tt i was very likeable. why, i hate myself so much now.

gahh. i guess i was a realli humourous funny and cute person then, wif a thinge of lively cheerful and amiable. haha i guess i exagerrated but, a little of all the above wouldnt be too generous alrite. wad happened to me, why is there a dark cloud hovering above my head and following wherever i go? why did u keep ur mouth shut and ur smile to urself.?! wad happened to all the humour which u were born wif and were once so proud of?! WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO U?! CHAOYI!

i couldnt answer myself. i didn noe wad caused the change. perhaps, all the things which happened? perhaps its jus part and parcel of growing up? i duno. i do not think i can find out. but yes this soul search. made me feel tt i acheived alittle smth today at least.
i looked thru my soul. i saw the person who had the same body as mi 5 yrs ago. i think i learnt a little today.

i will strive for the better. i can. i will =)



hahaha side note, this place is for me to write all my emo stuff. when im happy, i wun write it here, i wld tell every1 ard mi wif my mouth. spreading the joy i suppose? yea the place wher i pour my sorrows, where no1 other than me noes, here =) yea so if any1 is wondering why this person is forever emo nemo, tts the reason, cuz u are reading my blog, my personal archive of emotions.