Last week seemed to pass by so slowly, while this week seemed to haf been over in just a flash, needa go back to sch soon, like tue.?
Well.. The exam mood is coming up again but... I'm spending so much time slacking, dreaming, sleeping, playing games, etc. Bleh. See how it goes yea.
I belonged to everyone. I belonged to myself. No other one person shld haf the privilege of having me unless I gave u the permission. Understand? No.? Well ok.
Saturday, March 29, 2014
Sunday, March 23, 2014
My own world
So I think i jus realised smth impt ytd. By eliminating a lot of my frens frm my circle and keeping only a few left, it seems tt I've successfully created a small world of my own.
A world which I feel comfortable wif. A world, I didn wanna get out frm. It struck me ytd when I finally met up wif my frens, it's been a while and ya they are concerned abt me and all. Since I haven't been all tt truthful and all. I can't face it properly yet. Tt look of disdain, heh, I don't think anyone can get used to it eh.
So... I suppose it's time tt.. I step out of my world, open tt door which I shut it so tightly. Well... Goodbye to u.. I'm sry abt tt but if ure able to look frm a broader point of view, I'm trying to hurt us both and for ur greater happiness. I hope things work out the way I wanted.
I hope u won't be too hurt. I haf to do this.
A world which I feel comfortable wif. A world, I didn wanna get out frm. It struck me ytd when I finally met up wif my frens, it's been a while and ya they are concerned abt me and all. Since I haven't been all tt truthful and all. I can't face it properly yet. Tt look of disdain, heh, I don't think anyone can get used to it eh.
So... I suppose it's time tt.. I step out of my world, open tt door which I shut it so tightly. Well... Goodbye to u.. I'm sry abt tt but if ure able to look frm a broader point of view, I'm trying to hurt us both and for ur greater happiness. I hope things work out the way I wanted.
I hope u won't be too hurt. I haf to do this.
Friday, March 21, 2014
For peace.
How long has it been. A week and erm 2 days.? Heh, it certainly felt kinda long to me since I'm not doing much these days.
Prolly an update on life in case no one noes what I'm up to these days. Haaha everyday was spent rather peacefully for me. Since... Lessons will resume on April and I'm outta job and all. Money is kinda becoming a problem lol. Things started looking expensive and I'm rly trying to reduce my spending as much as I can but.. Well, things still happen, spendings still occur:| even tho I rly thought I did well this week.
Studying has been quite.. Not productive these days tho, since I wanted to save money and tried to stay home as much as I can. The bed, the comp and everything else is so... Tempting to me. Lol
Oh and.! I've resumed cycling, hahaha tt bike has been hanging there for so darn long and dust and dirt and dead leaves had been accumulating dere.-__- welll I took the effort to.. Clean up. So it's nice, good to go. Yay. All that in an attempt to reduce the amt of fats in my body lol. Yea u didn see wrongly, I felt tt I'm getting fat in some ways. Zzz
Namely the abdominal region. So.... Going thru some diet control and exercise routines. It felt kinda... Bad but well saves money too. So it's a 2 birds wif 1 stone ya .?
Uh tts abt all for now.
Going past the places which reminds me of u. Makes me feel funnily stupid n I can't help but think y was I so foolish, but well even wif tt said, I guess I wldve done the same if the same situation occurred again.
Peace out.
Prolly an update on life in case no one noes what I'm up to these days. Haaha everyday was spent rather peacefully for me. Since... Lessons will resume on April and I'm outta job and all. Money is kinda becoming a problem lol. Things started looking expensive and I'm rly trying to reduce my spending as much as I can but.. Well, things still happen, spendings still occur:| even tho I rly thought I did well this week.
Studying has been quite.. Not productive these days tho, since I wanted to save money and tried to stay home as much as I can. The bed, the comp and everything else is so... Tempting to me. Lol
Oh and.! I've resumed cycling, hahaha tt bike has been hanging there for so darn long and dust and dirt and dead leaves had been accumulating dere.-__- welll I took the effort to.. Clean up. So it's nice, good to go. Yay. All that in an attempt to reduce the amt of fats in my body lol. Yea u didn see wrongly, I felt tt I'm getting fat in some ways. Zzz
Namely the abdominal region. So.... Going thru some diet control and exercise routines. It felt kinda... Bad but well saves money too. So it's a 2 birds wif 1 stone ya .?
Uh tts abt all for now.
Going past the places which reminds me of u. Makes me feel funnily stupid n I can't help but think y was I so foolish, but well even wif tt said, I guess I wldve done the same if the same situation occurred again.
Peace out.
Saturday, March 15, 2014
goodbyes..2
slightly late. hmm 2 days? well.. finished work on thur and... was drinking happily on the night itself and slept for the nxt few days. heh
okay so i recieved a couple of thank you cards and stuff which is supposingly q sweet but... well... ok. i haf ppl whom ive nv seen b4 coming to tell me wad a pity tt this place is closing down and all. it simply felt like a sarcastic scorn. well did i mention it b4? but uh. this kind of ppl are... not worth entertaining.
fond memories.. reluctance to leave, a place full of nice memories tts gonna disappear. i wonder how it feels. uhh am kinda glad tt i actually worked to the point whereby i haf more unhappiness here than happiness. if not im not sure of how it wldve affected me. heh.
i feel... relieved. i felt.. freedom, happiness. haha sharp contrast to how others feel. goodbyes.. are necessary, cuz i dont think we will meet anymore.
ok do i haf to gif a brief summary ? ok i shall. short and sweet
uhh well it started as a challenge. at a pretty low point of life, i told myself tt if i can stretch my physical limits.. i shld try, if i can do smth tt i hate, perhaps i will bcome a better person. so i sucked. horribly. and then i became ok. and den ppl started telling me tt im good. which...i totally disagree wif. lOL. den came a time when i haf to go.
den i came back, well.. why did i.. cuz i wanted a particular someone to taste the coffee i make. ha...it ended pretty miserably. and! jus when i am ready to leave again, there happens my worse lost? i lost my hp and wallet and found myself being thrown into a financial pinch. heh... so i decided to continue for a while. and i tot tt its nt tt bad to make coffee for other ppl. for grateful customers, they were part of the reason why i stayed. ok so i stayed, and became a manager, having more responsibilities and all simply bcoz i cant rly stand the thought of working under someone who's less able than i am. SO, i had a say in most things. and i gave my all.
i made a makeshift family sort of scenerio, and i feel tt we're kinda bonded well. and den... i had to leave again. all the while.. even when im not ard, i still care. perhaps tt caused a huge blow on my academics. its not worth it but.. im not sane enuf to do both well.so.. i failed my own challenge to myself.
SO, i came back for an answer. and.. tho the answer wasnt wad i wanted..i started losing interest. den i started seeing how low some ppl are. started feeling tt its their honour to b served by me. started looking down on ppl. started being wad i didn want to be. but well.. i perservered. and tho each day seems very difficult to get by. i got by all of em. and i endured these unhappiness till the day it closed.
i did it. i completed smth.. which i rly hate so much.
service.
tt look of disdain tt ppl gave. tt haughty attitude tt ppl showed me. the shabby work attitudes tt my colleague gave me. i.. will remember it and i will remeber it well. for wad purpose.. i dont noe, but well its gotta affect my life.
to those who were thankful, to those who were nice. i sincerely thank u. and i apologize for my below excellent service attitude. well its simply bcoz of all the other ppl who made my mood foul. i..sincerely thank u ppl. its my pleasure, i wish tt u will haf a good life.
well.. to those final few ppl who worked.. i sincerely hope u all the best in life too. cuz frm ur work performance here, it sucked. i hope its bcuz of somebdy tt made u wad u bcame. kindly... gif a different attitude in life, all the best
oops. i guess tt bcame q long.
uhhh so. tts.. the end of this chapter. i am happy. i finally obtained. freedom.
im glad i saw u even at the end. haha. even if its jus a glance, jus a moment. its enuf. goodbye. farewell. i really hope tt one day, we will really meet again. and we will be able to talk like normal .
annyeong hi ki sae yo.
okay so i recieved a couple of thank you cards and stuff which is supposingly q sweet but... well... ok. i haf ppl whom ive nv seen b4 coming to tell me wad a pity tt this place is closing down and all. it simply felt like a sarcastic scorn. well did i mention it b4? but uh. this kind of ppl are... not worth entertaining.
fond memories.. reluctance to leave, a place full of nice memories tts gonna disappear. i wonder how it feels. uhh am kinda glad tt i actually worked to the point whereby i haf more unhappiness here than happiness. if not im not sure of how it wldve affected me. heh.
i feel... relieved. i felt.. freedom, happiness. haha sharp contrast to how others feel. goodbyes.. are necessary, cuz i dont think we will meet anymore.
ok do i haf to gif a brief summary ? ok i shall. short and sweet
uhh well it started as a challenge. at a pretty low point of life, i told myself tt if i can stretch my physical limits.. i shld try, if i can do smth tt i hate, perhaps i will bcome a better person. so i sucked. horribly. and then i became ok. and den ppl started telling me tt im good. which...i totally disagree wif. lOL. den came a time when i haf to go.
den i came back, well.. why did i.. cuz i wanted a particular someone to taste the coffee i make. ha...it ended pretty miserably. and! jus when i am ready to leave again, there happens my worse lost? i lost my hp and wallet and found myself being thrown into a financial pinch. heh... so i decided to continue for a while. and i tot tt its nt tt bad to make coffee for other ppl. for grateful customers, they were part of the reason why i stayed. ok so i stayed, and became a manager, having more responsibilities and all simply bcoz i cant rly stand the thought of working under someone who's less able than i am. SO, i had a say in most things. and i gave my all.
i made a makeshift family sort of scenerio, and i feel tt we're kinda bonded well. and den... i had to leave again. all the while.. even when im not ard, i still care. perhaps tt caused a huge blow on my academics. its not worth it but.. im not sane enuf to do both well.so.. i failed my own challenge to myself.
SO, i came back for an answer. and.. tho the answer wasnt wad i wanted..i started losing interest. den i started seeing how low some ppl are. started feeling tt its their honour to b served by me. started looking down on ppl. started being wad i didn want to be. but well.. i perservered. and tho each day seems very difficult to get by. i got by all of em. and i endured these unhappiness till the day it closed.
i did it. i completed smth.. which i rly hate so much.
service.
tt look of disdain tt ppl gave. tt haughty attitude tt ppl showed me. the shabby work attitudes tt my colleague gave me. i.. will remember it and i will remeber it well. for wad purpose.. i dont noe, but well its gotta affect my life.
to those who were thankful, to those who were nice. i sincerely thank u. and i apologize for my below excellent service attitude. well its simply bcoz of all the other ppl who made my mood foul. i..sincerely thank u ppl. its my pleasure, i wish tt u will haf a good life.
well.. to those final few ppl who worked.. i sincerely hope u all the best in life too. cuz frm ur work performance here, it sucked. i hope its bcuz of somebdy tt made u wad u bcame. kindly... gif a different attitude in life, all the best
oops. i guess tt bcame q long.
uhhh so. tts.. the end of this chapter. i am happy. i finally obtained. freedom.
im glad i saw u even at the end. haha. even if its jus a glance, jus a moment. its enuf. goodbye. farewell. i really hope tt one day, we will really meet again. and we will be able to talk like normal .
annyeong hi ki sae yo.
Tuesday, March 11, 2014
Goodbyes..1
So it has begun. Goodbyes.
I don't think I'm tt good with goodbyes cuz the thought of it seems pretty depressing alright. The fact tt ppl who used to be tgt can simply disappear frm ur life in jus a blink of an eye. Frens who pledged to stay in contact forever can slowly drift off and become acquaintances. All the experiences tts shared b4, all the bonds, doesn't rly matter tt much.
The tot of not being able to see tt person again seems quite sad while at the same time, if we ever meet again, will We be able to talk like now. Will we be able to feel the same sense of familiarity. Perhaps not. So... Ugh.
Ppl saying goodbyes, I face it wif a nonchalant face. It's not bcoz I don't feel anything. It's jus tt I don't noe how to make a sad face. Truth be told, life's like this, ppl come and go. Friends drift, lovers break up, empire falls, rocks erodes. Nth is forever, when the time comes, it comes. So yea the time is now, some lingering unwillingness to leave all these behind but, it's causing me more unhappiness than the satisfaction tt i gain.
All the fancy "oh I'm gon miss u, oh keep in touch, ohh. Bla bla bla" seems pretty much like scorns and it's pretty meaningless. Since, humans are actually pretty much forgetful creatures as well. Jus a bye will do, if we ever meet again... I'll judge whether u deserve a "hi", a small talk, or a catchup session.
Uhhh. Did I make any sense at all? Lol will edit it again later la ok, the end is near, a new begining is approaching and I hope I can look forward to it.
seeing her kinda makes me feel happy cuz it reminds me of u. Jus another glance will help me recall the fond memories which is no longer within my grasp but... U can't blame me for wanting to think of u every once in a while righht.?
Hah. This untold story is so bitter, yet at the same time beautiful. Don't u think. Or is it jus creepy. -__- hahaha.
Nonetheless. Tts abt all for now.
I don't think I'm tt good with goodbyes cuz the thought of it seems pretty depressing alright. The fact tt ppl who used to be tgt can simply disappear frm ur life in jus a blink of an eye. Frens who pledged to stay in contact forever can slowly drift off and become acquaintances. All the experiences tts shared b4, all the bonds, doesn't rly matter tt much.
The tot of not being able to see tt person again seems quite sad while at the same time, if we ever meet again, will We be able to talk like now. Will we be able to feel the same sense of familiarity. Perhaps not. So... Ugh.
Ppl saying goodbyes, I face it wif a nonchalant face. It's not bcoz I don't feel anything. It's jus tt I don't noe how to make a sad face. Truth be told, life's like this, ppl come and go. Friends drift, lovers break up, empire falls, rocks erodes. Nth is forever, when the time comes, it comes. So yea the time is now, some lingering unwillingness to leave all these behind but, it's causing me more unhappiness than the satisfaction tt i gain.
All the fancy "oh I'm gon miss u, oh keep in touch, ohh. Bla bla bla" seems pretty much like scorns and it's pretty meaningless. Since, humans are actually pretty much forgetful creatures as well. Jus a bye will do, if we ever meet again... I'll judge whether u deserve a "hi", a small talk, or a catchup session.
Uhhh. Did I make any sense at all? Lol will edit it again later la ok, the end is near, a new begining is approaching and I hope I can look forward to it.
seeing her kinda makes me feel happy cuz it reminds me of u. Jus another glance will help me recall the fond memories which is no longer within my grasp but... U can't blame me for wanting to think of u every once in a while righht.?
Hah. This untold story is so bitter, yet at the same time beautiful. Don't u think. Or is it jus creepy. -__- hahaha.
Nonetheless. Tts abt all for now.
Tuesday, March 04, 2014
Somewhere
So it's pretty depressing to know tt my comp is pretty dead. K just kidding, I'm more depressed abt my attitude.. Academic wise. Still pretty laid back, pretty much ignorant and I guess even wif tt fatal blow last year, why am I still so slack. Where was my fighting spirit den... Well... I guess I'm jus this kind of lousy person.
So my comp is kinda not functioning.. And my dad is nice enuf to take the initiative to go out of his way and keep paying money to help me make it functioning again. Which.. Kinda make me sad tt why is he being so nice, wads his motive.. Or is it jus love. I don't wanna disappoint anyone anymore but... I'm so sleepy so.. Lol I can't work hard.-__- ahh... I'll see wad I can do yea.? Ya. Let's... Do this.
Somehow.
anw being back in the library feels pretty comfortable... Despite it being so crowded and all. I guess it's pretty much set tt I'm gonna, u noe, come here daily after everything is done. I meant work wise hahhaha. Perhaps my next entry is gonna b a long one abt my work, perhaps ill blog b4 den.
Nonetheless. Tts prolly all I wanted to say for nw.
So my comp is kinda not functioning.. And my dad is nice enuf to take the initiative to go out of his way and keep paying money to help me make it functioning again. Which.. Kinda make me sad tt why is he being so nice, wads his motive.. Or is it jus love. I don't wanna disappoint anyone anymore but... I'm so sleepy so.. Lol I can't work hard.-__- ahh... I'll see wad I can do yea.? Ya. Let's... Do this.
Somehow.
anw being back in the library feels pretty comfortable... Despite it being so crowded and all. I guess it's pretty much set tt I'm gonna, u noe, come here daily after everything is done. I meant work wise hahhaha. Perhaps my next entry is gonna b a long one abt my work, perhaps ill blog b4 den.
Nonetheless. Tts prolly all I wanted to say for nw.
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