Having this strange insomnia since whoever noes when, nth to do and laid down on my bed trying hard to slp but cldnt. Screw this seriously. Hahahaa damn it, had some wonderful wise quotes in my mind earlier but I kinda forgotten all abt them alrdy... Lemme recall.. Ahh!!
Ok not having wise quotes actually, jus remb smth to bitch abt... Hmmm yea, been wondering abt smth vexing, m I too full of myself or m I having the correct thoughts. Y is it tt I'm always always working for ppl whom I deemed as a less capable human? Or rather, y m I always taking instructions from ppl who are less capable than me, y is my world always like this?!
Thinking back... Since army times, I take instructions from Olvl grad, unrecognized diploma holder, a strange m**, and blabla. All of which I deemed as inferior to mi. I grind my teeth in vexation. Cursing and swearing into my pillows in frustration. I was always unhappy wif things, always wanting to prove myself to b superior. But, I didn think tt I succeeded at all.... I left wif unhappiness but oh well.
Moving forward, I worked under a bunch of unsophisticated aunties afterwards, who cared nth much more than gossiping , backstabing every1 and enduring till 530pm everyday. I didn feel anything then but I certainly wasn't feeling VERy happy.
Nxt I worked undera few **enahs. Whom I totally didn give a damn abt, nxt, I worked under a *****pino stucked in a storeroom. Then, a group of strange, uneducated uncles who thought tt they are the heartbeat of a great organization( nt forgetting to add on, having ultimately poor sense of judgement and organization but excellent in covering backsides, not)
Lastly, I'm working under some strange dude hu can't speak eng fluently, talks to himself almost for the whole day, gets flustered easily and to top it off, loves criticizing other ppl and perpetually failing to look at his own capabilities. Also, a ********pino who is easily daunted, can't speak properly, loves pushing the blame to others.
Phew quite a long list over there. Looking thru, there are only 3 possibilities,
(1) I'm severely overestimating myself, they Are more than qualified to order me ard
(2) this is the only kind of job tt will employ this kind of lousy job applicant(me)
(3) I've been really unlucky to be unable to find a good job with good superiors who deserve my respect
Well well, I'm sure I will be able to answer tt in due time. Till then, I will cling on to life.!!!
C
Ahh much whining donee. Gonna try gg back to slp bb!!
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