its almost been a year since spinelli KAP closed down. wad haf i achieved thus far? mayb nth much. and tts pretty depressing. as ive said then, when the end comes a new beginning, apparently it rly wasnt a beginning for me cause ive been jus bouncing to and fro frm that same spot.
i thought tt i was moving forward but i slowly realised that im still stucked there.
i wonder wad made me become wad i am now. is it because of the increased contact with my parents and my family? the reduced no. of times tt i had to make my own decisions? when the time i had to make a certain decision, i realized that i was rly hoping to discuss it with someone else. and not able to make my own decision on the spot.
ive grown weaker. without realizing.
my confidence, my pride, my problem solving skills are on the decline. i used to be strong, able to stand on my own 2 feet w/o any aid from anyone. i used to be dependable. but now, i feel so helplesss on my own, im depending so much on other ppl tt i felt tt ive became a liability. no CY no. ure better than that.
and here i am, trying my best not to pray, tt i will get a favourable reply soon. but u noe, i wanna end this journey quickly, regardless of the sacrifice tt i hafta make. sso yea. take note ok? cy. regain urself. regain ur honour, ur pride, ur screwed up attitude. =|
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