realisation.

when u realized that ppl are so not interested in you. when, you tot you scored pretty well in other ppl's scoreboard but in fact you're nth.

how many times has it been, where I tot I did pretty ok but in the end, I jus fked up. I guess I'm just shitty tts why. and I sincerely wonder wher did all those self confidence came from. =|

so yea, had tried to visit starbucks a couple of times to study, in hope to see some familiar faces or smth to u know, try to reminisce the past.
but well, it is not only until 2 days ago tt I realized that I... am not looking for familiar faces. I am just waiting for u. heh. following the lead which I had 2 years ago, I thought if I kept gg there, I might just bump into you, and u know, perhaps we can jus get in touch again.

well yes, realization that the probability of tt happening is rly low, and even if in the minute chance that we happen to meet, would u jus walk away? would u sit down and jus chat like before? I don't know, good chance that u wld pretend u didn see me and jus walk away tho. lol

so yup, ive gotta let go of everything in the past. I gotta man up and be someone new, someone I wanted to become.